A Post About Peppers

For some strange reason I've been fascinated with the word "pepper" and have been trying to incorporate it in my everyday conversations. Peppers. Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers! Some of my friends think I'm insane for doing this, but honestly I can't help it. Peppers. Well, here's what I know about them. Chili peppers remind me of smiles. I hate yellow peppers. Dr. Pepper and Pepsi are amazingly good. So be warned if I use the word pepper in daily conversation.. I'm just trying to make it cool! This reminds me of a half remembered story about my friend Mallory and I and our secret code names for people. We were saying back and forth to each other "Salt!" "Pepper!" "Paprika!" and our friend Daniel interjected and said, "You know, some people really are named Paprika!" It was so funny I'm still laughing about it. Have you ever had a word you couldn't get out of your head? Anyways have a great Pepper filled night!

God Bless,
Jenny J

[Music Monday] Featuring: Breathe

http://youtu.be/pUKO6yOWm-g

Breathe by: Ryan Star

This song is just absolutely incredible. I can just relate to both sides of this song and that's what I enjoy about it. He screams breathe to the listener and I constantly need to be reminded to "just breathe". I also feel compelled to tell others that it will be okay, breathe, relax, everything will work out! I absolutely adore Ryan Star's voice and the topics of his songs. My parents actually know his music better than I do because they knew him when he was competing on Rock Star Supernova and we apparently own his autographed guitar! Anyways, just listen and enjoy!

God Bless,

Jenny J

Unfinished Poems Series One: Love

If I haven't told you already, I have become completely obsessed with spoken word poetry. I think it's my niche and I would love to get involved with it soon! Given my confidence cooperates! Anyways, I decided to start off by writing down poems. I like to write about what I know and I also swoon over sappy love stories so I thought, I can write about that! I should note that all of these poems are unedited, untitled, and most importantly unfinished. (Unfinished? I think that makes them more beautiful. Life is filled with incomplete thoughts and some questions never receive answers.) Some people sing songs in the shower, I fit together iambic pentameter and other types of poetry. So here we go!

1. I want kids, not so picket fences, and the whole shabang-
and the only imagery that goes with that fantasy is the attachment of your last name.

2. All that I want is contentment
but that takes a backseat when I realize my issues with commitment.
Will he laugh at the way I pronounce hair or gush as I parade around with my flair?
Or will he "fall out of love" and have an affair?
Oh how I hope not.
I hope he sweeps me off my feet and vanquishes that terrible thought.

3. I often cringe when you call me friend... all I want is to be more.
As I ponder that thought I have decided to settle this silly war.
In the end I'll be your friend: the one you laugh with and adore.
Forget about all of the trinkets and tokens
I just want us to learn how to be unbroken.
Let's mold together as one
not fair weather or just for fun.
Friend give me your heart and in kind
I will give you mine.

4. When you look at every girl with infatuation in your eyes
you've missed the point and you're missing the prize.
Falling in love isn't about settling on someone
it's about selecting "The One".
My mother always warned me about guys like you.
She told me to never be number three or four.
To find a guy searching for something more.
Because I shouldn't be part of a collection,
No, I should be a one of a kind selection.

5. Long distance relationship:
My heart is on temporary loan
to a guy who literally lives almost a thousand miles and whom I've never met.
I'm not quite ready to call it love (mostly because I'm sane)
but I am ready to hop on a plane or train,
or even my little car that could - get me to him.
I've been told a thousand times I could have any guy I want
and even if that was true my heart doesn't want anyone else.
When my brain tells my heart to just forget it - that it is impossible
my heart looks into his eyes and they whisper "I'm possible".
Postcards, love letters, phone calls -
recounting every word, every story, every emotion felt.
We'd have so much to say and even when we run out of words, we'd have each other.
I'm not running away.
I'm making a wish upon a star and I'm crossing my fingers -
that even a thousand miles away he'll feel the same.

Personal Perfect

Today I was blessed with the opportunity to go with my dear friend Jessica to her card making party. She is a Stampin' Up Demonstrator and taught me the basics up card making and scrapbook pages. This opportunity gave way to another million ideas inside my head. Give me tools and I can hand you an idea and a uniquely crafted end product. I am a perfectionist in many ways, but had to forget about perfect when it came to anything "Do It Yourself". I'm learning how to forget perfect a lot these days! Anyways, Jessica is so gifted and all of her cards are just completely amazing. If it's supposed to be straight, it's straight. If it needs to be centered, it's centered. When I started my cards I analyzed hers and planned to copy hers exactly as they were. Then came my first mistake. Then second. After the third I said, "Never mind I'll just make them eccentric." Then they came out my very own, and I was actually very proud of things I made with my own hands. Not picture perfect, but personal perfect, and that was enough for me! Anyways thank you Jessica for the wonderful opportunity! So much fun!

If you would like to see awesome stuff check out Jessica's blog: http://stampwithjessica.blogspot.com/ and if you would like to learn how to make cards let me know and I'll put you in contact with her!

God Bless,
Jenny J

Not Medium

My name Jenna literally means "little bird" in Arabic and I've always been obsessed with being little. I don't see people and judge them for their weight. Trust me I'm not an evil skinny girl. I've just had this mindset that I must be the smallest possible. I enjoy shopping in the kids section for clothes, doing kiddish things, and mimicking everything child-like. I guess it's Peter Pan syndrome in the sense that I don't want to grow up. I went shopping today and grabbed a jacket to try on and automatically reached for the small. My mom shook her head and insisted that I try on the medium. I pouted and said "Please never say that again, I'm a small." Medium - what a strange word. I don't even like my steak medium, it has to be well done. Medium is just plain ordinary, and why would I want to be ordinary? I guess I've always seen myself as an old soul, but I naturally assume the world sees me as a child and I try to constantly fit myself in that self-defined box. As some of you know my Twitter handle is @littleShields and my mom sighs every time I refer to myself as such. She insists that I'm normal sized and maybe I am. I don't know. People say things like "It's all about the little things" and "The best gifts come in small packages."And I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you ever meet me I hope you see me all tied up in my ribbons and bows called clothes and refer to me as "little".

God Bless,
Jenny J

Star

"You will be the star in starting over and over again."



I often forget about the stars. Sometimes I don't even look up to see them. And other times they are all I can think about. I think about how when I have kids I'm going to put up glowing stars in their rooms, so that they are always reminded that they are surrounded by light. At night I try to remember to take a moment to thank God for creating the stars, and even though He placed them so high in the sky and light years away I can still see a glimpse of their sparkling light, "what impossible light". 

Everytime I look up at the stars I remember when my friend Richard and I were talking at church camp one night many years ago. We were all sitting in a trailer on the traditional hay-ride. I looked up and pointed at the stars and exclaimed how wonderful it was to get to see the stars. He took my hand, the one pointing up to the sky, and said "Jenny, there's always stars in the sky at night, even in the city! You just have to look long enough to see that they're there." And it may seem silly, but I had never realized that before then.

I just thought that stars decided on their own time when and where they were going to show their faces.

So here's my challenge for you. When you have a chance go look outside and admire the stars and their magical light. Pick one for yourself, and know that it shines for you!

God Bless,

Jenny J

Bicycle:Life

I've never been the best bicyclist. Actually the day my mom first took the training wheels off my bicycle was the day I never wanted to ride a bike again. My feet always get tangled in the pedals and I've never been able to properly use the brakes. I always hear the comparison that life is like riding a bike - you have to keep getting back on and trying over and over again, and maybe one day you'll feel the adrenaline rush of accomplishment and truly feel alive. I've never ridden too fast or too slow and I like to ride next to someone that I can talk to without having to catch up with or wait for. Maybe one day I'll get to that hill and take my hands off the handlebars and feel the air rush into my lungs. 

Love Letters by: Sarah Kay

God Bless,

Jenny J

[Turn Those Speakers Up Tuesday] Featuring: You Won't Be Mine

You Won't Be Mine: Matchbox Twenty

This song is pretty much a hidden secret from the world. I stumbled upon it a few days ago and simply had to push replay a thousand times. Rob Thomas is a genius songwriter and his words speak to my soul. "Take yourself out to the curb - and sit and wait - A fool for life." This song doesn't have any personal significance to me, but if I ever felt compelled to tell someone they wouldn't be mine I hope I could convey it as beautifully as this song. Enjoy!

God Bless,

Jenny J

The Woman Within

As I go through life I learn about what it means to be a woman. My opinion is that most societies have a warped view of this in general. The most basic necessity of a woman is Respect. Honestly, respect is a difficult concept to comprehend. Liberals have twisted the meaning of respecting woman into something despicable. They spout out things like woman should be able to do whatever they want with their bodies. They sexualize us into these airbrushed images and we are ordered to torture ourselves to fit that description. Why do we do it? My only hypothesis is to be loved by the men of society. But what is this love? The marital love that the Bible talks about? Or is this love the sexual, desire-filled love? I don't understand how Angelina Jolie and Olivia Wilde trump the Proverbs 31 woman. Pure insanity. And what happens when a girl falls into society's trap and has sex? Are her insecurities washed away? No, quite the opposite. She finds more reasons to despise who she is. Does she get to feel loved? Often not. The man uses her and disrespects her in every regard of the word. What happens if she gets pregnant? "What about my future? I can't be a single mother. I don't want to throw everything away. This baby will only remind me of that loser that hooked up with me." That's the argument I've heard society whisper into the ears of every girl out there. It's heart breaking. Somehow society has convinced intelligent yet naive women that killing her child is acceptable because it is more convenient for her in the long run. I'd say many in society even encourage women to think this way more often than not. So the woman is left emotionally damaged and alone. And the cycle repeats. I see it everyday. I'm tempted to conform every single day. But honestly, I'd rather wait for respect. Now waiting is by no means easy. The tears will come in droves, insecurities will pile up on your shoulders, and temporary satisfaction will seem so very tempting. But know this: waiting means gaining even more worth as a woman. A real man of God will fall head over heels in love with you and will respect every part of you. Stay Strong Girl!

The following videos allowed me to reflect on what it means to be a woman in society today. Warning: not suitable for girls younger than 18 due to content and language watch with discernment.

 Katie Makkai - Pretty

Brave New Voices: Alysia Harris - That Girl

Alysia Harris - "Cab Rides and the Morning After"

God Bless,

Jenny J

Personal Price

Today in church we discussed betrayal and addressed the ultimate betrayal: Judas selling out and betraying Jesus for 30 pieces of silver. As I sat there I contemplated the numerous times I have been betrayed personally, and how all of those circumstances called for me to make loyalty a crucial characteristic requirement in the people I associate with. My pastor went on to say that we personally betray Christ when we choose sin over righteousness. That struck me to the core. Judas betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver and I reject Jesus everytime I sell myself to sin over righteousness. And for what: Attention? Money? Fame? Lust? Jesus Christ died on the cross to save me from the punishment of sin: Death. And for some reason that's not enough. I convince myself that worldly pleasures and personal satisfaction no matter how temporary are more important. What a warped sense of reality! We are so blessed to have such a loving God that knows and understands everything about us. He knows we are going to make mistakes and be complete messes, but He loves us anyways. He wants our loyalty, but doesn't hold grudges when we turn away from Him. He wants to redeem us and welcome us. And our salvation? Never temporary. It is eternal just by believing in Him. Just unfathomable.

Then my pastor shared this story: A man propositioned a woman for $1 million. She accepted. He then inquired if he could change it to $10,000. She was outraged and asked him what kind of person he thought she was. He said "We already settled that, now we're just naming a price."

Don't sell yourself out for temporary pleasure. You know our God? He knows all of your flaws, imperfections, secret sins, and every betrayal, and STILL thinks of you as His priceless beloved child. Jesus Christ already paid the price for us. Our God loves us from the inside out!

God Bless,
Jenny J

Hello

So, hello. I'd say the word in general is one of the most powerful words to be said. As some of you know I have a usual joke where I say: "I've always wanted a smooth talker to walk into my life." Well the fact of the matter is, I haven't had this happen and maybe never will. But maybe because that's not how it's supposed to work. Conversations are the very essence of life and words are the means for which we communicate. They bring people together, tear them apart, and change lives forever. Are you willing to start a conversation? If not, are you ready to listen? If your answer is no in both regards, you should rethink and take that chance. It will surely change your life.

"People are interesting. They all have something to say." -"The Young Girl and the Monsoon"

God Bless,
Jenny J

Smile Again

"If I fall along the way Pick me up and dust me off And if I get too tired to make it Be my breath so I can walk

If I need some other love Give me more than I can stand And when my smile gets old and faded Wait around I'll smile again" - Matchbox 20

It sure is nice to smile again! The weight is off my shoulders and happiness fills my veins!

God Bless,
Jenny J

Texan Paradise

Deep In The Heart Of Texas

Lately I've been thinking about how awesome Texas is and how blessed I am to live in such a wonderful place. Being a Texan is a special privilege that many of us hold close to our heart. I believe we are entitled to our well-known and respected reputation. You seriously don't mess with Texas! Everyone has a Texan connection which is always so cool to me and you can't say you don't because you are reading my blog so I'm your connection! I've been begging a few of my friends to move to Texas so I can share the goodness with them. Some are skeptical, but you know if you told someone you were moving to Texas, no questions would be asked. It's just a part of life. A lot of people from other countries love America because they know Texas is in America. They love our stereotypical but not all that exaggerated reputation.
I enjoy saying "ya'll", going to the rodeo, driving through the big cities and seeing the Dallas skyline, the rich history, bluebonnets, Whataburger, Barbecue, The Alamo, Six Flags, and even the bipolar weather!
I know that Governor Perry dropped out of the race today to my disappointment as he was my candidate. So I got to thinking and wondered "Why now?!" Although I am still disappointed, I know that he and his family will be returning home to glorious Texas. HOME. That's what Texas is and always will be. God Bless Texas!If you aren't a Texan, I strongly encourage you to move here as soon as possible. I will personally welcome you HOME.

God Bless,
Jenny J   

It's Never Too Late

I'll be the first person to tell you I don't always have the best judgement. I've made mistakes. Big ones. Tiny ones. Mistakes all the same. The most important lesson to learn, and I should note that I'm still learning is that it's okay to forgive yourself for your past. You're going to be messy, that's just a fact of life. But once you've learned your lesson, what's the point in carrying all of that weight of regrets on your shoulders? I am no psychologist but from personal experience I'd advise you to start letting go. It's okay, you're allowed to let go. It won't be easy, and it helps when people are there to hold you accountable and call you out when you start turning back to your old habits. You might not listen to them at first, and think they have no business telling you what to do. But the people that tell you the brutal truth, are the people that care the most about your well-being.
[I ask for you to keep me in your prayers and pray for my life and that I will stay strong and not turn back. Thank you!]

God Bless,
Jenny J

Easy To Find

"If things were easy to find they wouldn't be worth finding." - Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

I'd apply this to love as well. I think it's important to remember that love and every other important thing in life is special and takes time to find the right answers, or merely glimpses of the right answers. Food for thought!

God Bless,
Jenny J

[Music Monday] Featuring: Drive By

My new favorite song is Drive By by Train. It reminds me of the guy I currently have a crush on and I just picture him singing it to me. I hope you listen to it and love it just as much as I do!

God Bless,
Jenny J

Free Fallin'

When I got into my car to drive home from church this song started playing on the radio. I had to laugh because the beginning of the song is pretty much an accurate description of who I am as a person. Then I got to thinking about free falling and how that is pretty much how I've been living life lately. I have just been going with the flow, no real goals or desires. I think this is why I've been so bothered lately, because usually I'm such an ambitious person, and how ashamed I am of myself for being so lazy and content. But what am I going to do if I ever truly hit rock bottom? I'm so dependent on everyone else and on the idea that everything will remain the same. I don't know, I just think the whole "ignorance is bliss/everything will be okay" mentality that I have is only going to prepare me for future failures. What a scary thought!

God Bless,
Jenny J   

The Girl Who Exclaimed Best Friend

Friends. Everyone wants them, everyone needs them. What credentials qualify one to be a "best friend"? All of my life I have made it a mission to have a best friend. Someone who understands me, makes me laugh, calls me out when I need to be, and can accept me for all that I am. I've often become so wrapped up in longing for a best friend that I would just instantly start calling everyone my best friend. The problem with that is that if everyone is "The Best" no one truly is and it lessens the true meaning of what it means to be "Jenny's Best Friend." There are some friends that I have that as soon as I met them, we instantly connected. They're special friends, and that connection doesn't discount them, but does an instant connection qualify? I just don't know. There are some friends I have never met in real life that I talk to all the time and have the deepest, most thought-provoking conversations with; while they are incredible people, I'd have to say they can't possibly qualify to be best friends, if we've never met.. right? Then again there are those friends I have known all my life, fought with, laughed with, and maybe got in trouble with, but unfortunately I rarely see or talk to them.  Does length of time determine who is best?
Here's what I know. It's good to be friends with everyone. This doesn't mean buy them Christmas presents or wear friendship bracelets. It means saying "Hi! How are you?" even when you don't feel like it. It means honesty and loyalty. Trust me, gossip and backstabbing are the worst ways to lose friends, not to mention those behaviors just make you look silly. And I'll even say, if you do feel the need to talk about that person when they aren't around, tell others how awesome they are and how you appreciate their friendship and how they personally impact your life (This will be a good point of reflection and you might even realize how much they matter to you!) Friendship is about sharing a piece of your life with another. Don't be afraid to talk about yourself. People don't like to ask questions, so it's okay to share. Believe me, if they are making the effort to talk to you, they want to know at least something about you. I have a running joke that some of the people I talk to must be in The Witness Protection Program, because they never say anything personal about themselves. Seems silly, but so true! On the other hand, you have to be open to them and let them share too. Friendship is a two-way street and listening is crucial in the success of one.
I could go on and on about friendship but I won't bore you with my theoretical nonsense! I will end with this: Acquaintances, Friends, and Best Friends are all different terms for a reason, and you should have some of each. Be personable, cheerful and inclusive. Who knows, you could change somebody's life, just by a sprinkle of kindness.

God Bless,
Jenny J

Little Miss Jenny J

So hello world, I'm Jenny Julianna Shields. You're probably wondering why I actually decided to create a blog, when I had been so adamantly against it in the past: for fear of doing what everyone else was doing. Who knows, maybe I am, but at the slight chance I'm not, I hope my blog will be able to inspire you in a new and different way. I am a lover of life and I feel compelled to share that love with others. I've always wanted to be thought of as one of those special people that changes a person's life for the better, and I take that mentality and use it on others. I've had hundreds of people change my life significantly, and I hope I told them so. I just want to expand my influence by using a blog format to tell others that they are worth so much to me and to this world, and that they shouldn't be afraid to live in it. So that's my mission. Let the fun times begin.

God Bless,
Jenny J