Friends. Everyone wants them, everyone needs them. What credentials qualify one to be a "best friend"? All of my life I have made it a mission to have a best friend. Someone who understands me, makes me laugh, calls me out when I need to be, and can accept me for all that I am. I've often become so wrapped up in longing for a best friend that I would just instantly start calling everyone my best friend. The problem with that is that if everyone is "The Best" no one truly is and it lessens the true meaning of what it means to be "Jenny's Best Friend." There are some friends that I have that as soon as I met them, we instantly connected. They're special friends, and that connection doesn't discount them, but does an instant connection qualify? I just don't know. There are some friends I have never met in real life that I talk to all the time and have the deepest, most thought-provoking conversations with; while they are incredible people, I'd have to say they can't possibly qualify to be best friends, if we've never met.. right? Then again there are those friends I have known all my life, fought with, laughed with, and maybe got in trouble with, but unfortunately I rarely see or talk to them. Does length of time determine who is best?
Here's what I know. It's good to be friends with everyone. This doesn't mean buy them Christmas presents or wear friendship bracelets. It means saying "Hi! How are you?" even when you don't feel like it. It means honesty and loyalty. Trust me, gossip and backstabbing are the worst ways to lose friends, not to mention those behaviors just make you look silly. And I'll even say, if you do feel the need to talk about that person when they aren't around, tell others how awesome they are and how you appreciate their friendship and how they personally impact your life (This will be a good point of reflection and you might even realize how much they matter to you!) Friendship is about sharing a piece of your life with another. Don't be afraid to talk about yourself. People don't like to ask questions, so it's okay to share. Believe me, if they are making the effort to talk to you, they want to know at least something about you. I have a running joke that some of the people I talk to must be in The Witness Protection Program, because they never say anything personal about themselves. Seems silly, but so true! On the other hand, you have to be open to them and let them share too. Friendship is a two-way street and listening is crucial in the success of one.
I could go on and on about friendship but I won't bore you with my theoretical nonsense! I will end with this: Acquaintances, Friends, and Best Friends are all different terms for a reason, and you should have some of each. Be personable, cheerful and inclusive. Who knows, you could change somebody's life, just by a sprinkle of kindness.
God Bless,
Jenny J
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